10.8 神的外貌 Godly Appearances

现代心理学有说，正常健康的人中还没发现有能回忆出三岁之前的事的，但在精神病患者中不罕见。前文所谈论的 “宿命通”现象都发生在精神病人中。我认为那是因为人对事物的记忆是和情感记忆储存在一起的，那 “宿命通”是被精神病人的情绪剧烈迅速变化激发出来的。那么，刘团长怎么确信我卢岩一定会疯？读者当知，现代的心理学和精神病学尚不知道精神病的起因；刘团长居然确信他能造出精神病，而且他还确信“我卢岩疯了之后，会自愈”，怎么说？

Modern psychology says that no one in normal healthy people can recall things before the age of three, but it is not uncommon among mentally ill people. The “fate through” phenomena discussed above all occurs in mentally ill patients. I believe that's because people's memories of affairs are stored with their emotional memories, and that "fate through" is triggered by drastic and rapid changes in psychopath's emotions. So, how is Troupe Leader Liu sure that I, Luyan, will go crazy? Readers should know that modern psychology and psychiatry do not yet know the causes of psychosis; but Troupe Leader Liu was convinced that he could create mental illness, and he was also sure that “after I Luyan is crazy, I will heal myself”, wherein?

假如我疯狂之后，就死了，他的那么多的工作全都无效了！没用的事，他干那干嘛！2014年，我理解了我是刘团长灵魂转世实验的对象后，就常想我的病因是什么？

If I go crazy and die, all his works will be useless! Why would he do that if those are useless! In 2014, after I understood that I was the subject of Troupe Leader Liu’s soul reincarnation experiment, I often wondered what the cause of my illness was.

（1）心病入门病例 Introductory Case of Mental Disorder

我在一次复读我的回忆录时，注意到了4.8节的《精神病入门病例》。甲人在路上，看见对面走来一个人，脸上流着血，匆匆忙忙地从集市上离开。当时，甲人没在意；可走过去后，他忽然想：哎呀！刚才那个人好像认识。甲人却想不起来那人是谁，或者在哪儿见过。过了几天，甲人听说那个脸上流血的人死了，就感觉不舒服。几天后，甲人病了。崔凤龙姨父讲：甲人那病的治疗办法，就是去参加那个人的葬礼，去恭恭敬敬地给人家送殡。

In one of my re-readings of my memoirs, I noticed the Introductory Case of Mental Disorder in section 4.8. Person A was on the road when he saw a man walking across the street, with blood running down his face, hurrying away from the fair. At the time, Person A didn't care; but after walking past, he suddenly thought, “Oops!” He seemed to recognize that man just now. Person A could not remember who that man was or where he had seen him. A few days later, Person A heard that the man with the bleeding face had died, and he felt sick. A few days later, Person A became ill. Uncle Dragon told him that the cure for Person A's illness was to go to that person's funeral and give him a respectful send-off.

记得一次，崔凤龙姨父再次给我讲这个故事，我表示不信。他突然大怒：“信不信你给我记着！我听说医院的精神科医生85-95%不懂精神病；你怎么知道你一辈子就遇不上！ 记住了，这故事就可能救你一命！”

When I was a teenager, once Uncle Dragon told me this introductory case of mental illness again. I expressed disbelief. He suddenly got angry: “Believe it or not, you give me to remember it! I heard that 85-95% of the psychiatrists in the hospital do not understand mental illness; how do you know you will never encounter it in your life! Remember it, this story may save you one life!”

（2）案例二 Case II

我回忆起了小时候，妈妈给我讲的稀罕事。她去我二姨家回来，非常兴奋，说：“我遇见你二姨家小二，你二哥了，我没认出来他。他说话，我听到他的声音，才认出他来了，吓了一跳！他瘦了体重的三分之一，都脱相了！”

I recalled a rare event that my mom told me when I was a child. Once, she came back from my second aunt's house, very excited, and said, “I met your second aunt's second son, your second brother, and I didn't recognize him. He spoke and I was shocked to hear his voice before I recognized him! He's lost a third of his weight, he's so thin that he lost his appearance!”

我惊讶地问：“哎呀！他得啥病了？现在怎么样了？”

妈妈回答：“说了你也不信！他遭殃了！”

I was shocked and asked, "Geez! What disease did he get? How is he now?"

Mom replied, "You won't believe me when I tell you! He encountered a Misfortune!"

我听不懂妈妈在说什么呢！妈妈解释说：“刚开始我也不信，但看他瘦成了那样儿！不信也不行啊！这是你二哥他自己说的。他去上班的路上，常常在一个老年人聚集的地方看见一个老头儿，面熟，像是认识似的，笑眯眯的。他觉得那老头儿挺好，和蔼可亲，就偶尔和他打个招呼，说句话。一天，他又路过那儿，那老头儿死了，那家在发丧呢。你二哥他没参加过丧礼，好奇，就进去看了看。回来两天后，就病了，吃不下饭，睡不着觉，瘦掉了体重的三分之一。他沈阳、鞍山的大医院都去了，做了很多检查、测试。结果都是什么病也没有；谁也解释不了他是怎么了。他就只能回家等死了。没办法了，你二姨就去了一个大神家。那个大神是个女的。你二姨才说几句，人家就说了：他遭殃了！对人家无礼了；你得这么办。大神让你二哥给人家赔礼道歉去！那个大神说，人呼吸到最后一口气的时候是殃。”

I couldn't understand what my mom was saying! Mom explained, “At first I didn't believe it either, but look at how thin he is! I should not unbelieve! Your second brother said it himself. On his way to work, he often saw an old man in a place where old people gathered, looking familiar, smiling as if he knew him. He thought the old man was nice and kind, so he occasionally said hello and had words with him. One day, he passed by there again, and the old man had died, and the family was in mourning. Your second brother, who had never attended a funeral, was curious, so he went in to look. Two days later, he was sick, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, lost one-third of his body weight. He went to the big hospitals in Shenyang and Anshan and did a lot of examinations and tests. The results were all what was not sick; no one could explain what was wrong with him. He could only go home and wait for death. There was nothing else to do, so your second aunt went to the home of a Big God. The Big God is a woman. When your second aunt said a few words, she said, ‘He encountered a Misfortune, was rude to him! This is what you must do.’ The Big God told your second brother should go and apologize to the old man! That Big God said, ‘When a human breathes his last, is Misfortune.’”

妈妈说：“好歹！这也是有了个希望。他们就按照大神说的买了猪头和水果等东西，到那老头儿的坟前上供。按照大神的说法，磕头道歉后，你二哥要绕着坟走三圈，一边走，一边叨咕着给人家道歉。那时候，你二哥都走不动了。俩人搀着他，走了三圈。你二哥他自己说的，走到第三圈的时候，他感觉出了一身汗。三圈走完了，他的病就好了70%。到家了，病就好了，前后不到两个小时，跟正常人一样了。当然，他还是那么瘦。”

Mom said, “For better or worse! This is also a hope. They then bought things like a pig's head and fruits as the Big God said and went “to common wealth” to the old man's grave. According to the Big God, after kowtowing and apologizing, your second brother had to walk around the grave three times, and as he did so, he jabbered an apology to the old man. At that time, your second brother couldn't even walk. Two people helped him to walk three rounds. Your second brother said himself that when he came to the third circle, he felt sweaty. After three laps, he was 70% better. By the time he reached home, he was cured, less than two hours before and after, just like a normal person. Of course, he was still so thin.”

（3）神的外貌 Godly Appearances

后来，我又注意到了13.1.1节《地狱趣》中 “出神身血即堕地狱”一句，和11.2节《四大种》中的 “若大种有变化，依其而造的一切都随之而变”一句，分析出了前面两个案例的道理。这里先从神的外貌说起。

Later, I noticed the sentence “Bleeding god's body, falling into hell instantly” in Section 13.1.1, Hell Interest, and the sentence "If there is a change in the Big Seeds, everything created according to them changes with it" in Section 11.2, Four Big Seeds；then, I analyzed out the truth of the previous two cases. Let’s start here with God’s appearance.

人脑思维在处理客观事物的过程中，总是自主地简化客观对象，抽取各类默认模特，如人、蝴蝶、树等。然后以此默认模特来认知其它同类个体。比如女人，我们看见个体女人会描述大眼睛，高鼻梁，高个子，有点儿瘦等。这些描述都是人脑通过把对方和自己思维机制里的默认女人模特进行比较而采集出的特征，以此来认知对向，乃至所有的女人。

In the process of dealing with objective things, human brain always simplifies the objective objects autonomously, and extracts all kinds of default models, such as woman, man, butterfly, trees, and so on. The default models are then used to recognize other individuals of the same kind. For example, when we see an individual woman, we might describe her as having big eyes, a high nose beam, tall, and a bit thin. These descriptions are the characteristics that human brain picks up by comparing the objective person with the default woman model in its own thinking mechanism, to recognize the objective individual woman, or even all women.

此中，默认的女人模特就是女人的定义，即女神。人脑通过女神这个模特来建立其它的女人，也就是说所有的个体女人都是从女神派生出来的，即女神是女人的种子, 能生出其它女人。同理，我们可以得出男神是男人的种子，能派生出所有类似的男人；蛇神是蛇的种子，能派生出其它的蛇；树神是树的种子，可以生出很多树，等。

In this case, the default woman model is the definition of woman, i.e., Goddess. Human brain creates other women through adding traits to the default woman model, and so on, all individual women are derived from Goddess, which is saying Goddess is the seed of woman, give birth to other women. Similarly, we can conclude that the male god is the seed of the man, which can give birth to all similar men; the snake god is the seed of snake, which can give rise to other snakes; tree god is the seed of tree, which can generate many trees, and so on.

现实生活中就有和男神女神长的类似的人，就可能会有与神类似的性质。那女神什么样？现代心理学描述这种人的长相为“可以藏在人群里的人”，比如，他是这种长相，你跟他不熟。他在前面跑，你在后面追他。路边有几个人，他转身往那几个人中一站，你就找不着他了。

In real life there are people who look like God and goddesses, and they are possible to have a nature like that of a god and goddess. What does God look like? Modern psychology describes this kind of person as “someone who can hide in a crowd”, for example, he looks like this, and you don't know him well. He runs in front of you, and you chase after him. There are a few people on the side of the road, he turns around and stands in the middle of them, then you can not find him.

前段文字表明，神的外貌，没有特征，是无记性的。你看见他了，知道他是个男人，有些面熟；可离开他后，很快你就想不起来他的长相了。

The preceding passage shows that God's appearance, without features, is memoryless. You see him, know that he is a man, and that there is some familiarity about him; but after you leave him, you soon cannot remember what he looks like.

佛经里是这样描述女神的：不高不矮，不胖不瘦，不黑不白，眼睛不大不小，鼻梁不高不低，体温冬暖夏凉，不笑不说话，欲说话先笑。家里来客人了，出迎在先，进屋在后；进屋之后，后坐先起。

Buddhist scriptures describe goddess like this: neither tall nor short, neither fat nor thin, neither black nor white, eyes neither big nor small, nose bridge neither high nor low, body temperature warm in winter and cool in summer, doesn’t laugh doesn’t speak, laughs first before she wants to speak. When a guest comes to her home, she greets at front, enters house behind; after entering the house, sits down the last and stands up the first.

为什么女神总是笑！？笔者认为幸福欢乐的玉女是女神，悲伤哭泣的玉女是殃。另外，女神的外貌会因为民族，地域和历史时期的不同而有差异。读者可以想象，华人女神的外貌和阿拉伯女神会有差别。

Why does goddess always laugh!? Author me believes that a happy or joyful Eve is a goddess, and a sad or weeping Eve is a misfortune. In addition, the appearances of goddesses may vary according to ethnicities, regions, and historical periods. Readers can imagine that the appearance of Chinese goddesses would be different from that of Arabian goddesses.

（4）案例一和二的分析 Analysis of Cases I and II

案例一中，那个脸上流血的人容貌酷似男神，而他的脸上流着血。依据11.2节《四大种》中的 “若大种有变化，依其而造的一切都随之而变” 一句的说法，甲人看见后，他头脑思维机制中的许多男人的脸上都流血了，就引起了神经错乱。崔凤龙姨父说， “治疗的办法就是恭恭敬敬地去给人家送殡” ，这怎么就能治疗神经错乱呢？无意识，古作神识，是个自主神经系统；当它再次见到那个脸上流血的人，那时已经是坟了，就会自主更新那老人的形象，所以那个 “脸上流血” 的男人种就被自动修复了，神经错乱就被治好了。

In Case I, the man with bleeding face had appearance of God, and he had blood flowing from his face. Based on the statement in Section 11.2, "The Four Great Seeds", "If there is a change in the Great Seeds, everything that is created accordingly to changes with them", Man A， saw that，therefore many men in his mind mechanism had blood on their faces, and it caused a nervous disorder. Uncle Dragon said, “The cure is to respectfully go to that dead man's funerals”, how can this be a cure for a psychosis? Unconscious, ancient as God-sense, is an autonomous nervous system; when it sees the man with the bleeding face again, by then it is already a grave, it will autonomously update the image of the old man, so that the “seed of the man” (default model of man) is automatically rectified, so the mental disorder is cured.

案例二中，笔者我认为，我二哥患了和病例一相同的病，治疗方法也相同。那时，我二哥看见那老头儿的尸体，已经脱相了，就引起了我二哥思维机制中“男人种”的更改，从而引起了神经错乱。

In Case II, author me think, my second brother suffered from the same disease as Case I, and the treatment was the same. At that time, when my brother saw the old man's corpse who had already lost his shape, which altered the “man seed” （i.e., default man model） in my brother's mind mechanism, therefore he fell into mental disorder.

（5）我的病因 The Cause of My Illness

我的心病起因是和女神刘健君吵架。我回忆起了我和刘健君第一次见面的情景（参见7.3节《相亲》），刘健君女神的影响力太强大了！一见面我就遇到了许多意外，身心情感经历了一系列极端强烈迅猛的变化，十几分钟后就被刺激伤了，病了。随后，我们俩的相处也不和谐，我不断地被她气得发晕，一次还把她说哭了。哭泣的玉女是殃，我就遭殃了。随后，每隔一段时间，刘团长都会指使人和我再次说起刘健君，把我和她的关系摆成了对立的局面，使我的精神病潜伏症迅速发展，一年后就有了发作的迹象（参见8.7节《出故事的人》）。

The cause of my mental illness is fighting with Goddess Eve Liu. I recalled my first meeting with Eve Liu (see Section 7.3, "Blind Date"); the influence of the goddess Liu Jianjun was so powerful! As soon as we met, I encountered many accidents, my body and mind went through a series of extremely strong and swift changes emotionally. After ten minutes I was stimulated to injury and illness. Subsequently, the two of us do not get along harmoniously, I am constantly being angry with her, once also said she cried. Crying Eve is Misfortune, so I encountered a Misfortune there. Once for a while, Troupe Leader Liu would instruct someone to talk to me again about Eve Liu, setting up my relationship with her as antagonistic, causing my latent psychosis to develop rapidly, with signs of an attack a year later (see Section 8.7, "The Man Who Initiating Stories").

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